With all of the books, counseling, and classes to help us parent better the simple truth is children need T.I.M.E. (Time wIth M E) What do you remember about your parents? Is it the family chores? Reading together? Missed ball games? Coming home to an empty house? Playing ball with your Mom or Tea party with your Dad? If you think about your happy childhood moments most likely they will have one thing in common The presence of one or both of your parents. I remember playing baseball in the backyard and playing cards while camping. Sure I experienced happy moments outside of my relationship with my parents but these moments are the ones that stick out the most to me. Why? T.I.M.E. My parents took the time away from work and family chores to spend time with me. Time that they chose to say I care about you. You are valued. How do you find T.I.M.E.? You are given 24 hours to spend each day. This is the same amount of time parents have always had and most likely it will not increase any time soon. The key to finding the time to spend with your children is setting Priorities. Children used to come along Mama and Papa to work but somewhere along the line work took over and children were shipped to schools, daycares, after-school programs and so on. We in America have put our children in a safe closet so that we can build a kingdom for the future only now that they are adults they have no desire to spend time with their parents. They were taught that work, property, and recreational activities are more important than family. What went wrong? No relationship was formed. Relationship with anyone is always built on time. Think about how you and your spouse met. Did you spend time with him/her? Did you want to know everything they liked? Did? Cared about? Time and communication are the backbone to any relationship without it no bond is formed. Children dont form relationships with parents simply on the fact that they share the same bloodline. T.I.M.E. is needed to get to know one another to laugh to cry to share and even to argue. The Toolbox A simple yet effective tool to get you started is an activity jar. Write down some activities that you can do with your children. Make sure they are activities that they enjoy. When your together time comes and if you are a parent it could be six in the morning or just before bed choose an activity from the jar and do it. Everyday Time Finding time for your children is really about making time for them. Make time in the morning before they go to school, make time in the middle of the day by adding a special treat to their lunch, or spend some quality time together just before bedtime. When your children ask a question STOP what you are doing, look into their eyes and really listen with your heart to what he/she has to say. Get Down and Dirty Get down and dirty with your children. Really get into their world. Build along side them. Let them lead the playtime. If they want to slop in the mud put on your boots and do the same. If they want to pretend to have a tea party be their guest of honor. When baking or preparing a simple meal bring them along side you. Life is too short to spend Working 24/7. Start making memories today. |
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